She awoke with a jolt when she was deposited back into her own bed from another dimension where she was visiting in the night. Maybe it was just a dream, there’s no way of telling in this world. She mentally checks herself and gets up to choose the time of day. She decides upon the moment just before the sun rises over the horizon when the world is coloured in hope. She gets a little annoyed with people who run their lives by their watches and complains that they never have time, but not everyone understands that you can make your own time if you want to. She pulls her jersey over her shoulders and goes to the kitchen to make tea and takes it outside to watch Hope rise with the sun.
She always sits on the big rock that juts out from the edge and hangs precariously over the sea. Passing sailors often mistake her for a siren when they see her sitting there and her unsung song reaches their hearts. Most of them get scared and they adjust their sails to make a wide berth around the island. Some are fascinated and intrigued by her and the lighthouse, it’s a curiosity, and they try to dock in the bay. The Kraken normally scares them off pretty quickly, the ones that get past the Kraken she allows on the island, but they never stay. Lighthouses are fascinating to some like that, they want to visit but few want to stay in such a solitary place. When the sun pops out over the horizon like a ball that was kept under water by a giant invisible hand, she paints the sky grey to suit her mood with storm clouds in the distance and calls up the wind. Later today it will rain.
She knows today is the day. She saw the raft in the bay. She finishes her tea and goes back inside. She rinses her mug and starts brewing his coffee, she knows the smell will wake him and bring him down to hug her. The Kraken wails at the back door and she opens it to let him in, she strokes his tentacles affectionately before he crawls under her skin and folds himself around her insides. “Hey” he greets from behind her. “It seems like a miserable day” she turns and he folds her into his arms, he is warm and smells of dreams. “It sure does” she says, “Coffee?” he lets her go and she turns to the counter to pour it for him. They sit at the kitchen table in silence for a while. “You know I am going today” he tells-asks her. “Yes I know” her eyes are downcast and she is acutely aware of the wood grain in the table top and the sound of water dripping into the basin. It sounds like a heartbeat, she is glad she packed her heart away in the suitcase with her tears. The Kraken tightens his grip around her insides to keep her from spilling out onto the kitchen floor. “I would stay if I could, you know that right?” “Yes” she answers quietly. “I am leaving my Crow, if you want to talk to me whisper your words to him, he will find me and I will return your message with my words”. She nods and smiles, “Okay”. He takes her hand “I would like to stay, but I have to find my ship, I’m sorry”. “Don’t be” she says “I understand”. She gets up from the table “wait here, I have something for you” she runs upstairs and fetches the gift box from the top of the cupboard under the blankets where she hid it.
He is still sitting at the kitchen table when she gets to the foot of the stairs, he is staring out the window, she takes a snapshot of him sitting there, his profile was always so beautiful to her. She will put it on the shelf with the other memories in the room she keeps locked later. She goes to him, puts her hand on his shoulder and the gift on the table in front of him. “Open it, it’s just something small” he loosens the ribbon, opens the box and folds away the paper inside “Gentle” she says “it’s breakable” he lifts the glass sphere out of the box, it is filled with light. “What is it?” he asks “It’s a little bit of me, so you don’t forget to remember me. If you break the glass it will go inside your heart. You can keep it if you want it, I am not using it”. He thanks her and puts it back in the box. “I have to go now” he says as he gets up from the table. He hugs her tight and strokes her hair, her face is buried in his chest, she holds on to him like someone who is about to fall. Finally she breathes deeply and lets him go. “I will walk you out”, he takes her hand and they walk to the bay where the raft is docked. “See you soon” he says as he waves goodbye, he looks relieved. She stands on the pier until she can no longer see him and turns to go back inside. She closes the door as the rain starts, and from the outside, with it’s boarded up windows, the lighthouse looks abandoned. She misses him already.
© N Kruger – 12 September 2012