After finishing my book last night, I’m feeling rather philosophical. Which doesn’t bode well for my state of mind because I don’t think one can be philosophical and entirely sane at the same time. Since there is no one around at the moment to philosophize with, I shall process my thoughts here. I’ve been thinking a lot about longing, need and discontent and searching for home. I have also been pondering the possibility of multiple lives lived in multiple dimensions or universes all at once. Which, by the way, I think is entirely possible. I don’t think we begin to understand and grasp the concept of time and space.
What if aspects of myself is stretched out across multiple dimensions, each one living a different life, right now at this very moment. Some part of myself could be anywhere right now. If this is the case, if parts of my Self are segmented and scattered across multiple universes in different timelines that would mean that I am indeed not whole, I am only a piece of myself. Would that not explain that feeling within my Self that something is amiss, that constant searching, that longing. Would that not also explain our need as humans to group together. Maybe our need to do that and the reason why we seek out people that are similar to us is because by having those people around we create an illusion of feeling whole. We feel more content, like we belong. Maybe the saying “like attracts like” has more to it than what we understand. Or maybe it could also be that the people we connect with are the same people we have around us in our other lives. Have you ever met someone and just had an instant connection with them, felt like you know them? Maybe that’s why, it’s because we do know them, in another life, another dimension. When we have those feelings of “I’ve been here before, I’ve done this before” but you know that you haven’t, maybe you have, while living your other life.
Maybe that part of us that is infinitely wise and all knowing knows this. That part we mostly deny and don’t connect with. It’s that part of ourselves, the part we pretend does not exist that manifests in our being as feeling alone, it’s the part that is searching. But we are not searching for a place or a person. What we are searching for is ourselves. That is what is missing. What if when we die and we leave our bodies behind, we are simply reunited with a part of ourselves in another dimension or universe. Maybe when you feel like you’ve grown or you suddenly understand something or feel happier and more content, it’s because one of your Selves died in another Universe and it seeked you out and reunited with you. Parts of our Selves die in our other lives and it reunites with other parts of ourselves, until only one is left and we are whole. Maybe that is what heaven is. Being whole. Maybe that is why I feel discontent in this life. Maybe I have not been reunited with many parts of myself. Maybe I am made up of only a tiny bit of myself. I am only a fragment of myself. And I’m slightly jealous of my other Selves living other lives feeling more content and together than what I do. Because try as I might, I feel the way I feel. And isn’t our lives entirely made up of what we feel. The world happens inside of us. Regardless of what goes on outside of us it always comes back to how we feel. And I create my reality from within me. So the Universe is indeed inside of me, I am the Universe and I create the world as each moment goes by based on what I feel. What if the very next second is only a blank empty space, completely void of anything. And simply by extending my thoughts to it, I create it. What if, I open my mind and let go of everything I know the veils between dimensions and lives will simply drop away and I can be reunited with myself this very instant….
Merrily, Merrily, Merrily, Merrily, life is but a dream…