I finally finished reading “The Empty Boat” by Osho. What a profound book. Really. Everyone that is serious about expanding and opening their consciousness should read this book. You may or may not have read this post, where I asked some really deep existential questions. I had a conversation with a friend yesterday on the topic, where I spoke about all the questions that I’m raising at the moment, all the stuff that is coming up for me. I see it as an awesome opportunity for growth, and she agrees. It’s not often we can move into situations and afforded the opportunity to consciously and with awareness work on issues that come up for us and not project those onto others. It’s not a comfortable space to be in always but it still is awesome. One of the questions that I asked was “Why do we even have relationships” and last night as I read the the last chapter of “The Empty Boat” I read this:
”But life is movement and life is trust. Love happens – one has to move into it. Where it leads is not the point. The goal is not the point. The very movement of your consciousness in love is a revelation. The other is not the point; the beloved or the lover is not the point. The point is that you can love, that it could happen to you; that your being opens in trust, without any doubt, without any questioning. This very opening is a fulfillment.
But the mind will say, “Wait, let me think and decide; one should not take any step in haste.” Then you can wait and wait. That’s how you have been missing life. Every moment life knocks at your door, but you are thinking. You say to life, “Wait, I will open the door, but let me first decide.” It never happens. Your whole life will come and go, and you will be simply dragging, neither alive nor dead, and both are good because death has a life of its own.”
When I read that, the lightbulb went on for me. The point is that you CAN love, the point is opening your being in trust, and that is the important thing. Conscious vulnerability. Being open and trusting in life, in love, allowing yourself to love and to receive love. But we let our minds interfere and then it just becomes white noise and the beauty of it is lost. When you love someone (in whatever capacity) the point is not what the point is of the relationship. It doesn’t matter if it’s going to last for a day or for 20 years. It doesn’t matter that you might get hurt or not. The point is being present, moving through it, and learning as much as you can from it. Expanding and opening your consciousness.
We allow our minds to dictate our lives, always questioning, always waiting, always cautious. Instead of just trusting the process, going with the flow and moving along with it, being open to it. Life is simple, our minds complicate it. We are indeed our own worst enemies. I decided that I was going to live my life like that, open, conscious, vulnerable, trusting. I thought that I had veered off the path a bit, but I don’t think I have, even though my mind tries to interfere, even though I have ample amounts of kopraas. I can see past that to the truth of the matter and I allow myself to be in that uncomfortable space out of my comfort zone, that space where the magic happens…